


we'll ride them someday

by coalitiongirl_ficlets (coalitiongirl)



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Dark Emma, F/F, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-06
Updated: 2015-08-06
Packaged: 2018-04-13 08:35:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,531
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4515147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coalitiongirl/pseuds/coalitiongirl_ficlets
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Soulmate AU: Instead of your soulmate's first words to you written on your skin, it’s the last words you ever hear them say- </p><p>You won’t ever know them until you lose them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	we'll ride them someday

**Author's Note:**

> written for a tumblr prompt, not my fault, etc etc. BYE.

Emma’s soulmate words creep up from her wrist all the way to the crook of her elbow,  _I’m not going to give up on you._ She’s spent so many years of her life being given up on that she almost considers her soulmate words a comfort instead of a curse. Somewhere out there, someday, she’s going to matter to someone. (Sometimes she wants to scream with frustration that she’s going to lose this mysterious person, that she’ll have this gift only to lose it again.)

Regina’s soulmate words are succinct and terrible and have her trembling each time she turns her wrist to see them.  _I hate you_. That’s what her soulmate’s last words to her will be. She can’t believe that this is how it works, that she won’t even find love with the one person destined to love her, that she can be soundesirable for forever. (”You don’t need love,” Mother says, turning her wrist so the writing burns Regina’s eyes. “You need fear.” Mother’s tattoo says  _Did you ever love me?_ and Regina wants to rail at the unfairness of Mother being loved and Regina only being hated.)

Lily draws a star on Emma’s wrist and reads the words climbing up her wrist aloud. “Don’t,” Emma says, fearful of what she might lose. Neal never says the words, but he smiles and strokes them right up until the day when he gives up on her like he’d been made for it. 

The men and women privileged enough to see the skin of Regina’s wrist read the words there and muffle snickers, and she kills every one of them. 

* * *

When Snow had been a child, she’d read the writing on Regina’s wrist and burst into tears. Now that they’re older, past hate and curses and vengeance, she makes weak statements about loving again, each one of them punctuated by an anxious glance at her wrist. “Why,” Regina says wearily, and Snow has no answer for that.

When they’re lying in the Neverland heat, stripped down to tank tops and camisoles as they struggle to sleep, Regina hears the sharp intake of breath and knows that Emma has seen the words on her wrist. “Yours are better,” she says wryly, sliding her finger along Emma’s extended arm. 

Emma kisses her and tastes bitterness and loss and all the pain that comes from  _I hate you_ written on your arm. And Regina embraces her, seeks out the warmth that they can only find together, and Emma thinks that it’s a damned shame that they won’t be soulmates. But she can’t– she’d never say–

Emma doesn’t hate Regina, not anymore, and she doesn’t think she ever could again. And Regina  _not giving up on her_  is a foreign concept, too distant from who they are. Regina who distrusts and fears and couldn’t possibly  _want_. Emma who longs for something more than just Regina’s body in her arms.

A few days later, Emma’s last words to Regina at the town line are  _but it won’t be real_ and she hesitates at her car, beckons Regina and reaches for her hand and slides her coat sleeve up to read the words on her wrist. And they haven’t changed, of course. Your soulmate words don’t change just because someone else has– 

“Emma,” Regina says, her voice pained. “Please don’t do this.”  _Don’t try, don’t think that we could have been–_ These damned marks are an exercise in agony, in never knowing and in the knowledge of defeat. Emma slumps and Regina puts gloved hands on her cheeks and kisses her, right there in front of all their family and friends. 

“I won’t hate you,” Emma says, and her eyes stay open as Regina kisses her again, memorizing every tear that slips down their cheeks together.

* * *

Emma comes back to town and with it comes damned hope that isn’t hope but defeat. With it comes distance between them, still guarded and still unsure, and Emma still looks at Regina like she’s the sun and stars but she doesn’t approach her. Regina still looks at Emma like she could fill a whole world with her affection but she doesn’t wait for her anymore.

And then Marian, and then Ingrid, and then a thousand distractions and resentments that still somehow end with the two of them tangled together in Regina’s bed with kisses and bites and whispered promises, and Emma stays up long after Regina’s fallen asleep, tracing those ominous three words again and again.

The night after Maleficent is raised from the dead, Regina draws a kiss along Emma’s arm, gently and lovingly, and she doesn’t say the words– they don’t talk about them, they  _can’t_ , they can’t be soulmates or in love or speak those words to become them and lose each other– but there’s enough of  _I’m not going to give up on you_ in Regina’s eyes that Emma shivers and asks, “What did my mother meet you about earlier?” She doesn’t get an answer.

 _Emma, you’re better than this_ is close enough to the words on her wrist that Emma hesitates and doesn’t pull the trigger on Lily.  _Henry, do it!_ are the last words Regina hears Emma say in another world, and her eyes flicker open in sudden defiance. It won’t end like this– she wants–

Regina Mills has never so desperately longed for someone to tell her they hate her as she does Emma Swan. “It doesn’t matter,” Emma whispers when they wake up. They’re huddled together with Henry as they speak to the sorcerer, sensing the beginning of another era of peace. “We make our destiny. We don’t want or need to be…” 

 _You’ve worked too hard to have your happiness destroyed!_ are Emma Swan’s final words that Regina can hear. She never says  _I hate you_ and Regina loses her anyway, and she sobs and sobs over that damned dagger for what feels like an eternity.

* * *

The Dark One is cold and cruel and bitter, free with her words and her blows and Emma Swan no longer looks at her family with love. She lashes out at Henry–  _You can’t force me to do your bidding anymore. I’m not your babysitter. I’m not your mother–_ until Henry is shrinking back and Regina is stepping forward to confront her. “Emma, no.” 

“Emma,  _yes_ ,” Emma growls, looking her up and down with impersonal, naked hunger that has Regina shivering with mingled revulsion and need. “Aww, what’s wrong? Don’t like me as much when I’m not your adoring little puppy dog? What are you going to do, send me to obedience school?” She laughs mockingly. “Beg me to be a part of your family again?” 

“Stay away from us,” Regina says, because that’s always going to be her first priority. Emma’s eyes narrow, stung at Regina’s agreement, and she hurls out a wave of magic that sends Henry flying over the rail of the docks.

“Okay,” she says, and laughs again, cold and angry as Regina hurries after Henry. 

Henry is unharmed. Regina whirls back around, ready to do battle with Emma one more time, and the Dark One blurs into existence a foot in front of her. “See, you don’t seem to get it, Regina. Emma doesn’t live here anymore.” Emma moves with unnatural poise now, every physical tic that had ever annoyed Regina gone and replaced with reptilian grace. “That sad little lost girl who never mattered? She’s going to be free now. And she doesn’t need any of you.”

And there’s something glittering in her eyes, still needy and afraid and brittle where the Dark One is cold and methodical, and Regina loves that anger desperately. “But,” she whispers. “But Emma, we need you.” The coldness threatens to overwhelm the heat in Emma’s gaze and Regina hurries on. “You can fight this. I know you can. I’m here and I’m going to help you and Emma…” She breathes, long and low. “I love you,” she whispers, even though they weren’t going to say it. “And I’m not going to give up on you.” 

Emma is frozen in place for a moment and Henry croaks, “No. No, Mom–” and Regina doesn’t know why he’s suddenly crying as though it’s about to end. Her eyes are fixed on Emma, warring an unspeakable battle that Regina can barely glimpse.

“I hate you,” the Dark One snarls, and Regina thinks,  _I know these words._

Henry is screaming something Regina can’t make out and Emma breathes out a sound like a sob as she moves and then Regina doesn’t breathe at all.

Emma has one hand in her chest and the other wrapped around her in a twisted embrace, and when Regina looks down, she can see the long line of letters climbing up to Emma’s elbow. When Regina looks down, she can see her own hand tight on Emma’s, unable to stop her movements. 

Emma’s thumb brushes once against the words on Regina’s wrist with more tenderness than the Dark One should have ever been able to spare, and she’s still sobbing, her movements jerky as she fights herself and fails.

 _Oh_ , she says voicelessly, and the Dark One squeezes as Regina smiles.


End file.
